So, you’ve got yourself a fancy agency to create the ultimate advertising campaign in that country you’re so desperate to sell your new cars in? A shame they forgot to tell you you don’t stand a chance in advance, since the car name you chose means “cunt” to the locals. A top ten of badly chosen car names.

1. Mazda Laputa

The person that came up with this name took it from the famous “Gulliver’s Travels” story by Jonathan Swift. To Spanish buyers it didn’t sound so poetic when they went looking for a new car, since it means “the whore” in their language.

2. Mitsubitshi Pajero

Another Spanish advertising fuck up. Literally. Pajero means “wanker” in Spanish.

3. Buick Lacrosse

This car was marketed in both America and Canada. Seems Buick forgot that parts of Canada speak French, in which Lacrosse means “masturbating teenager”. Perhaps it says more about the French that they actually have one word for this…

4. Chevrolet Nova

Such a large part of the world, and even Chevrolet’s homecountry, speak Spanish. Yet, Chevrolet forgot to check wat Nova means in this language: “No va” translates to “doesn’t go”. Ouch.

5. Opel Ascona

Another one from Spain: Would you ever buy an Opel “Cunt”?

6. Honda Fitta

As in any other part of the world, cunts are quite popular in the land of car advertising. What’s better than a normal cunt? A Swedish or Norwegian cunt! And that’s exactly what “Fitta” mean in these languages. Maybe not such a bad carname after all, me and Robert wouldn’t mind having one.

7. Daihatsu Charade

Here’s one I’ve always wondered at: Why call a car “charade”? Is it because it only pretends to be a car? Or just to help their owners speak the truth when someone asks them what car they drive?

8. AMC Gremlin

Uhmm. Ok. I guess AMC was just too busy building cars to realize Gremlin stands for “ugly little monster” when they launched this car. Funny movie though.

9. Dodge Swinger

Maybe not such a bad car to buy for actual swingers, they might even attract some other folks to have sex with!

10. Ford Pinto

Ok, we’ve had the cunts, let’s have some male company. Pinto means “penis” in Brazil and Portugal. Somehow it doesn’t sound to impressive to my Dutch ears either. I can remember some people who used it as a nickname for their joint…